Monday, December 17, 2012

Tuesday on Tape #3 - Phat Beach


#3 - Phat Beach (9/18/12)

Tuesdays on Tape Rating Scale™
Previews: 0/1
Soundtrack: .5/.5
B&T: 1.5/1.5
Graphics: .5/1
Sound Effects: .5/.5
Likable Characters: 1/1
Memorable Moments/Quotables/Emotion: 1.5/1.5
Total: 5.5/7

Rent or Buy?: Buy

Personal Thoughts: Phat Beach is a great movie. This beach adventure stars Lean on Me favorite hefty homeboy Huggy Hopkins. It also happened to be the first movie the committee rated. We all had a blast!

Benny and his friend Durrell steal Benny's dad's car and take a trip to the beach to find love and fortune. Along the way, they run into misfortune after misfortune, often to hilarious effect.

I saw the movie for the first time in around 1999 on USA Up All Night. It's always been one of my favorites. Upon rewatching, I felt that the first half is much stronger than the second half. The jokes kinda peter out towards the end. That's not to say I didn't enjoy it. I grew attached to the characters (especially the main star's friend) and enjoyed seeing where their odyssey took them. I love movies that follow the characters on an epic adventure. Phat Beach is truly epic. It would have rated much higher on our 7 point rating system if only it had previews.

Should you watch Phat Beach? Yes. Doubly so if you enjoy urban comedies and beaches and Coolio.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Find of the Week (12/9/12 - 12/15/12)


X-Com: UFO Defense (PSX)
Value: $70 on eBay for incomplete copy
Actual Cost: $5

This find is what prompted me to document my great finds. This one was found at my favorite local flea market. My buddy Benny was playing my copy of XCOM: Enemy Unknown for the Playstation 3 (great game, by the way) and made casual mention that they had the Playstation port of the original at some game store he visited recently. After bugging him for more details, he remembered it was at a video game booth at the flea market, hidden away in a stack of games in generic paper sleeves.

It was a Sunday, and the flea market wouldn't be open again until Wednesday. I waited, a bit nervously, I admit, and drove there the first moment I could. We found the game right away. It was much to my surprise that the game was priced at $5! Normally this booth eBay checks games it knows to be rare. Luckily this Playstation gem slipped through the cracks.

My copy is incomplete, unfortunately, but I'm so elated that I don't even mind. The original X-Com: UFO Defense ranks in my top 10 games of all time (right behind it's sequel, Terror From the Deep, actually). I had kind of resigned myself to the thought of never being able to play. I surely wasn't about to pay $70 for a port of a game I could play on the PC for free. Still, it's one of my favorites, so I am elated to now own it for the Playstation.

How does the port hold up? It's pretty awesome. It's not quite as fast as playing in DOSBox. It has load times when going to the battlescape screens. The controls are quite clunky at first. It uses up one whole memory card. But, the gameplay is all there. The loading times encourage me to play "ironman"style with no reloads to try and avoid losing fallen soldiers. The controls get easier over time. I have all my Playstation saves backed up onto my PS2 hard drive. It even exceeds the original in one area, the soundtrack. Overall, it's quite awesome.

I am playing on Genius difficulty, and it's quite brutal in the early stages of the game. I may have to go back down to Veteran difficulty, because I can't beat the first month's terror mission for the life of me. That's something I don't want to do. I'll probably stick through with it for a few more tries. I want this to be a hardcore experience.

Surely, that's only fitting for a hardcore game find!

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Find of the Week (12/2/12 - 12/8/12)

I shop a lot. Often times I look for old VHS tapes/laserdiscs, video games, board games, etc. I have a few establishments I frequent, from thrift stores to flea markets to retro game stores (some of which give me discounts regularly).

Last week, I stopped by the top local thrift store for board gaming, Value World. I did manage to find a couple of board games, which I picked up (Nab-It and Beyond Balderdash). Having gone over their room of hundreds of games and puzzles, I decided to check out the VHS section. I've been doing a weekly tape-watching event with friends, so more tapes is always a good thing.

Usually Value World has a lackluster offering of VHS tapes compared to, say, St. Vincent DePaul. At first I found Hercules and the Amazon Women and not much else. Then something else caught my eye. In the middle of a stack of tapes, I spotted . . .


Boarding House (1982) VHS
Value: $28 on Amazon.com
Actual Cost: $0.50

Boardinghouse
is considered the first shot-on-video horror film. I'm a huge fan of SOV horror movies such as Sledgehammer, Black Devil Doll From Hell, etc. Boardinghouse is a particularly important find for me because a.) it's not available to download from any major torrent site I've checked in the past two years, and b.) the VHS goes for $28 on Amazon (the DVD is a whopping $70 at this point). I couldn't contain my excitement. I think I let out a squeal, to be honest. I snatched it up as soon as I could, just in case some smelly old lady decided to stroll up behind me and steal it in my stupor.

I haven't watched it yet, but when I do, expect a full review!

Friday, December 14, 2012

Tuesdays on Tape #1 & #2: Gunhed & Ocean Drive Weekend

The first two tapes featured in Tuesdays on Tape were viewed before the Tuesdays on Tape Rating Scale™ was established.




#1 - Gunhed (9/4/12)

Personal Thoughts: Gunhed was alright. The trailer made this look like the best mech movie ever. Basically, a group of scavengers break into an abandoned factory and get killed. One guy survives and finds a giant mech to fight back. The sets and special effects (GRAPHICS!) were awesome. Sadly, nothing really happened. Gunhed lacked action, suffered from poor pacing, and often times made no sense. I think this might be the case of a movie butchered during localization. Who knows? All I know is that it's a rent at best.



#2 - Ocean Drive Weekend (9/11/12)

Personal Thoughts: Ocean Drive Weekend is a Troma-released American Graffiti ripoff. A couple of college guys go to meet some girls at the beach. It is everything you would expect. It was humorous, but not hilarious. I liked the low budget feel and goofy charm of the southern actors. Overall, I'd recommend this movie to any fans of nostalgic comedies like American Graffiti and Porky's.

It's also worth noting that Ocean Drive Weekend is a VHS exclusive and can be found for no more than ten bucks tops.

Tuesdays on Tape

It all started in September of this year. I was hanging out with a few of my like-minded buddies when we conceived a brilliant idea. We decided to start a club to watch movies on VHS. Why VHS? Because we can find them for less than a dollar, not to mention the nostalgia we all hold for the format.

We would pick the most boring day of the week to convene: Tuesday. Thus, the club came to be known as Tuesdays on Tape.

Almost every week, we go out and buy "snacky snacks" before settling down in front of the VCR. The first two tapes were watched just for fun. Thereafter we decided that we would rate the tapes on a number of criteria. This criteria has come to be known as the Tuesdays on Tape Rating Scale™. It is a seven-point system that goes as follows:

Previews (1 point)
Soundtrack (0.5 points)
B&T (1.5 points)
Graphics (1 point)
Sound Effects (0.5 points)
Likable Characters (1 point)
Memorable Moments/Quotables/Emotion: (1.5 points)

Rent or Buy?

The scale really touches on everything that makes a tape great. Notice how I say we rate the tape?

That's because previews count for a whole point in addition to the content of the movie itself. (Half a point for having at least 4 previews, half a point for them being good.) Graphics is a funny way of categorizing all visual effects and mise-en-scène (including sets, costumes, cinematography, etc.). The other categories are self-explanatory. After each tape is viewed, the voting committee discusses and rates the movie.

From now on, I will post all results from past and future Tuesday on Tape meetings, as well as keep you up-to-date on any news. Stay tuned!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

A Christmas Story: The Musical


While this blog is geared toward topics like horror movies and video games, I must let you know that I am a fan of other genres as well. One of my favorite films is A Christmas Story. It is one of the few movies that capture the true feeling of being a child. You'd think that adult filmmakers would be able to do this more often, considering that we are all children for over a decade. Somewhere in the transition into adulthood, we often lose sight of what it means to be a kid. That's what makes this movie so special.

Gene Shepherd's humor provided the nostalgic basis for the film, which turned out to be a comedy classic when put into the hands of director Bob Clark. I am a fan of the stories on which the movie was based; yet I think that the tales reached a new level of genius when handled by the talented film crew and cast. That being said, I had the opportunity to watch the musical production based on the film when it came to Detroit at the Fox Theater on November 25th. In writing this review, I know I must address the issue of whether the musical could match up to the movie. Let me get it out the way and say that the musical is not nearly as good.


Don't get me wrong. The Seattle-based production was indeed wonderful. However, anyone going into the theater expecting a retelling of the story with as much magic as Clark's film will be disappointed. I had no such expectations and, thus, enjoyed it thoroughly.

Someone might watch a musical reimagining of a beloved classic film for a variety of reasons. Some may like musicals. I can understand that there is motivation in seeing what kinds of songs may be written about one of your favorite stories. I, personally, am not a fan of musicals. Musical numbers are often contrived and unpleasing to my musical tastes. The music in A Christmas Story was not bad, but I can only recall one musical number being memorable. "Ralphie to the Rescue" is certainly catchy and worth listening to again. Credit must be given for making all of the songs fit into the story.

I did not let my bias against musicals ruin my enjoyment of the show. I came to see the production for another reason: to see how things would turn out differently when performed on a stage by stage actors directed by a theater director. I was pleased with the results.

The plot pretty much followed that of the film closely. There were only a couple of changes. One plot point was omitted. Anyone familiar with the film may remember the scenario with the Little Orphan Annie decoder pin. That side plot didn't make the cut. This was surely done to shorten the run time. After sitting in uncomfortable theater seats for the length that I did, I did not mind the exclusion of a minor plot point to help pacing. The only other noticeable major change came late in the second act.

Again, this is probably only noticeable if you are familiar with the movie. A scene in which the infamous "Major Award" leg lamp is broken gets shuffled to the night before Christmas. The children of the family attempt in vain to piece the lamp back together while singing a number. I can only assume this was to provide some more human conflict to the tale end of the story. The whole scene really adds nothing and could have been omitted to help keep the length down. I'm not complaining, though, because it's a new spin on the old story. It actually does more to build the little brother Randy into a human character (which I don't care for, but hey, at least it's interesting).

Another aspect I got behind was the framing narrative. Jean Shepherd lent his trademark voice to the narration of the film. A voiceover probably wouldn't work as well on stage. The musical decided to compensate for this by changed the narrator into an onstage character. Now the audience is able to see Shepherd narrate into his radio mic as his sound effect guy provides the background noise. Shepherd is actually present in a few scenes, creating an interesting visual that never becomes a distraction.

Again, these changes aren't drastic. Only fans of the movie would notice. The plot is largely the same. The script borrows many of the same lines, and almost all the jokes are present. The narration still rattles off the classic lines. Overall, it's the same, yet I notice a little more exploration into the theme of Ralphie's disappointing odds of getting his Red Ryder BB gun. The narration does a good job of reminding the audience that the tides are against him. It's a small touch, but one I think adds to the overall story.

So the music's alright and the plot's all there. That leaves the acting. Everyone knows that the acting in the film is super. Peter Billingsley will forever be associated with the lead role of Ralphie in the original motion picture. Darren McGavin is synonymous with the old man. Ultimately, the acting on the stage recaptures the essence of the characters but lacks the nuances of the acting on the silver screen.

The 2011 production starred Clarke Hallum as Ralphie, John Bolton as the Old Man, among others. Hallum did a good job as Ralphie overall, but lacked the humorous enthusiasm in body language that Peter Billingsley and Kieran Kulkin portrayed in the same role. That's not to say it was bad. It is a stage show, and I cannot reasonably expect the acting to be the same. John Bolton portrayed the father as more of a hothead, similar to the way Charles Grodin did in It Runs in the Family (the 1994 "sequel" directed by Bob Clark using the same Shepherd source material). It wasn't bad either, just different from the perfect portrayal by McGavin.

Every time I show It Runs in the Family to friends, there is a resounding disappointment with the new actors (aside from Culkin, who did an excellent job). Being that this is a stage show, the acting is bound to be different. This meant everyone was free to enjoy the differences as a new interpretation, rather than an unfortunate side effect of an inferior production.

If you are able to enjoy a beloved classic being transferred to a different medium, I recommend you see the show should you be given the opportunity. I normally hate reimaginings of my favorite things, like terrible remakes of classic horror flicks. Still, I enjoyed this, and you probably would too.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Please Don't Feed My Kaiju - Ultraman E02

Ultraman E02 - "Shoot the Invader"


Alien Baltan is incinerating the city!


We continue our kaiju madness with episode 02 of Ultraman. "Shoot the Invader" is closer to what I expected from the series than episode 01. There's a ton of kiddy comic relief. I'm not complaining. The punchline at the end of the episode even made me laugh.


This tale is narrated by the goofiest Science Patrol squad member Ito. Aliens have arrived via invisible flying saucer and are freezing everyone in sight. Japanese officials agree to let the Science Patrol send Ito and Hayata to investigate after their first man is frozen. The space creatures, known as Alien Baltan, confuse their enemies with optical illusions and then freeze them with laser beams from their claws. The Science Patrol rayguns don't have much effect on the aliens, so Hayata decides to take a diplomatic approach. The aliens, using the Patrol's own affected member as a mouthpiece, explain that they have destroyed their own planet and are here to take over earth. It turns out that the Alien Baltan brought 60 billion of their own microscopic race and they're all hovering in the sky in their invisible ship. The creature we saw earlier is their biggest member. Hayata says screw that, and all hell breaks loose. The Baltan grows to 50 meters and smashes Hayata with its giant claw (!). Soon it starts tearing apart the city. Hayata, of course, uses his capsule, transforming into Ultraman and vanquishing his foe (and the space ship).


While the pre-fight plot is certainly juvenile in tone, it's never stupid. I didn't laugh at the childish joke about Ito wearing slippers, but I didn't get offended either. I liked to use of Ito as narrator. Ultraman definitely surprised me there, showing that it's not a one man show. Other characters show up again, like the charming little boy, yet the focus is really on Ito and Hayata. This episode did a good job building a connection with the two. I really hope Ito gets some more major roles. 


The empty building full of humans frozen in mid motion was kind of neat. The episode, despite its short length, really put over  the danger of the alien invasion. There's a scene showing a deliberation of Japanese officials and Science Patrol about how to handle the menace. The Alien Baltan really seemed more serious than Bemular from episode 01. The scene on the rooftop with the aliens speaking through the frozen Space Patrol member is actually really neat. I wouldn't go as far as to say it was creepy, but a little kid might be spooked by the monster. Really though, aside from a couple of Godzilla movies, the point of kaiju isn't to be scared but to see giant monsters fight!



The fight in this movie was a lot cooler than the first episode's cheesy wrestling. Most interestingly, it takes place at night. There are more model buildings too, as the fight takes place in a city as opposed to the rural area. My favorite scene in the show is when the Alien Baltan flamethrows and entire model skyscraper. Also of note is the show where Ultraman grabs the Baltan and flies with him through the silent night sky. The battle becomes an aerial dogfight, ending with the alien kaiju going down in flames. Despite being all of four minutes, I loved it all. The only thing negative I have to say is that the monster design wasn't nearly as appealing as the first episode. I guess I like the Godzilla rip off look of Bemular more than the insect-meets-crab look of this episode's monster. Nothing looked bad, but I've seen much cooler looking Ultra Monsters.


All in all, the show was very good. I liked it better than the first episode, even if the monster wasn't as cool. Ito makes a good lead protagonist. Special effects were really nice for the time, and the kaiju fighting was top notch for a short show like this. I'll continue watching the show and hope that the next episodes are as good!